The Five Love Languages

Hi beautiful soul,

Happy New Week to you

Loving me, loving you – aha …… you remember the ABBA song? I’ve learnt that each one of us likes to be loved in a different way – that love LOOKs different to us depending on how it is presented. This is known as the Five Love Languages

Dr. Gary Chapman, author of The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts, really breaks down for us an easy to understand format to help us respond to those we are in relationship with, in a better way.

The concept of love languages is actually quite simple. There are five of them, each describing an expression of—you guessed it—love. The key is discovering which love language you and your partner, child, parent, friend or work colleague respond to the most, then regularly putting that into practice. (remember that the love languages can be applied to ANY relationship you have in your life)

Keep in mind that you may be nodding your head at the description for more than one of these love languages. That’s normal. People tend to express love via a primary and secondary love language—and potentially even more that may not be mentioned here.

What are the Five Love Languages?

Words of Affirmation

These are verbal expressions of care and affection. Think: “Thanks for putting the kids to bed” or “You looked really nice today.” Typically, the less generic and more specific the words, the more meaningful they feel to the recipient. Conversely, insults can be particularly upsetting to people who favor words of affirmation.

Gifts

Tangible and intangible items that make you feel appreciated or noticed. Going to your friends concert, for example, is as much a gift as flowers or that new wine decanter they want. To individuals who favor this love language, the absence of everyday gestures or a missed special occasion are particularly hurtful.

Acts of Service

Doing something helpful or kind for the other person. Think: Waking up with the baby in the middle of the night or doing the dishes or fetching something. For someone who favors acts of service, ambivalence or a lack of support are more damaging than anything else.

Quality Time

Quality time is a part of every relationship—but people who experience this as a love language will feel the benefits more keenly, and crave time where both people are present without distraction. Quality time constitutes engaging in an activity together, particularly one you both enjoy, like a walk or watching a movie together or a coffee out. If this is your love language, having a distracted or distant partner or parent or friend that makes you feel unseen or unheard is the biggest pitfall.

Physical Touch

Physical expressions of love, whether sexual or platonic, such as holding hands, a back scratch, a hug, a kiss, or intercourse. The absence of such can leave these individuals feeling isolated in a relationship.

Here is a great summary of how to implement the love languages into your life

As you navigate this week, how can you meet someone you care about in your life with THEIR love language ?

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